Need a new job? Use these 4 steps to conquer your key weakness and get hired!
Use a little known, amazingly effective form of sales sales jujitsu to transform your critical weakness — and make you the strongest candidate.
Do you want to find a new job but are worried that something in your past will get in the way? Do you have an “elephant in the room?” — something you’re afraid might derail your job search when it becomes known?
In this article, you’ll learn how to use a form of sales jujitsu to turn the very thing you’re afraid of into the thing that gets you hired. You’ll do this with a powerful sales tactic called “Negative Reverse Selling.” Never heard of it? You’re not alone. Many people don’t know it and don’t use it. But Negative Reverse Selling is the ideal tool when you need to address something scary that could come up in a job interview.
“Negative Reverse Selling” (NRS) is an effective, disarming sales tactic you should know and occasionally use. If you’ve spent your entire career convincing people to buy, you’ll love learning about this. When you NRS, you basically are telling someone why something you are selling (in this case, you) might not be the right thing for them. Then you let them convince you that they still want to explore buying (hiring you) anyway.
What is your perceived weakness?
What scares you most about being a candidate? What are you most worried about having to talk about? That is your perceived weakness. This attribute or situation is somehow damaging or maybe even disqualifying.
What if getting fired or laid off lets you demonstrate that you’re exactly the right person for them to hire?
What if your fear of being too old or too young becomes the eye-catching pivot that lets you show you’re ideal for the role?
Or wouldn’t you like to demonstrate that the career gap or life-direction change you are coming back from is what makes you uniquely fitted to work at their firm?
If you’ve got something your afraid of in your past, in your next interview, consider using Negative Reverse Selling to completely own who you are, including whatever perceived weakness — that bad thing was that happened or whatever situation you have. Rather than putting it off or trying to minimize or deflect, I’d like you to even lead your next interview with what you think is your greatest weakness.
Wait, what?
Why on earth would I suggest that you lead with your weakness? Let me count the reasons:
They’ll find it, anyway
First, it’s not all of your weaknesses I want you to divulge. Just that one. The one that, if you try to hide it, the recruiter or hiring manager will find it anyway, smell your fear of it, and come get to you. Think of this weakness as an elephant in the interview room. Or a giant balloon that keeps getting bigger and bigger right in front of your faces. You know trying to hide it is futile. If you do try to hide, when they do see it, you’ll then have to launch a full scale defense about why you were hiding or downplaying it before it pops. And when they find that elephant in the room, they’ll realize you’re not-so-forthcoming and start looking at you to see what else you may be hiding. You can’t hide so you might as well be the one to point out the elephant and take the air out of that balloon so that it doesn’t blow up on you down the road.
You’ll demonstrate confidence and character
Few things demonstrate your confidence and character more than completely owning who you are. And if someone really is going to hate you when they know your perceived weakness, you’re much better off getting that right on the table so you can both find a better use of your time.
But guess what? If you do this right — the way I recommend — the interviewer will usually be intrigued and they may end up working pretty hard to convince you that yes, they really do want to keep talking with you. And they’ll likely admire your candor, maturity, and even your chutzpah. You will show you have courage, are forthright, and can be trusted. To be clear, you won’t always get hired, but you’ll be respected, and that’s the right way to start any mutual exploration.
You take the pressure off
When you tell someone right up front why they might not want to hire you or buy what you’re selling, you’ll often notice they relax. It completely changes the dynamic of the conversation. It makes the interviewer or client curious. That curiosity lets you then demonstrate that what could be perceived of as a weakness is actually an aspect of what makes you unique and highly valuable to the right employer. You’re going to show how this weakness is really related to some great reasons that they should hire you.
In short, your so-called “weakness” may represent the best chance of getting hired.
“Are you out of your FREAKING mind?”
—I heard you saying.
To paraphrase a great Billy Joel song:
You may be right
I may be crazy
Oh, but it just may be a lunatic
You're looking for— Billy Joel, You may be right
I may be a little crazy, but I am right about this. So, if you’ve got an elephant in the room, here’s a winning formula for your next interview:
You’re going to lead your conversation with that one perceived weakness that you’re worried about. You’ll state it plainly and without varnish or “spin.”
Let your interviewer know that you completely understand if they really don’t want to continue a conversation based on this weakness.
Then, you’ll share that if they do continue, you’d like to explore with them why being who you are is exceedingly valuable to the right employer. Even with, or maybe even especially because of that weakness.
Then let them decide if they are the right employer.
Want proof that Negative Reverse Selling works?
Here’s what I’ve said to hiring managers in three different job searches. In all three, I led each interview with my greatest perceived weakness — the reason I felt they would most not want to hire me. Spoiler alert: in each case, I was hired. Each time I interviewed, I shared my perceived weakness after our initial pleasantries but before we got into any qualifications for or discussions of the role they were hiring for.
“You know, I’m the oldest person you’re likely to interview for this role. Should you choose to hire me, I may in fact be the most experienced person in your entire company. Do you think it makes sense to continue our conversation? I’d understand completely either way.”
Later in my career, I was worried that my age would be my greatest weakness to prospective employers. They could hire cheaper, younger people all day long. For anyone above a certain age, there are myriad tales of age discrimination (always couched as something else — “team fit” “energy” “culture” being some examples.) And whether you’re worried about being too young or too old, you can’t really hide it. They can quickly read your resume, do the math and see roughly how old you are. If you try to hide it, you look weak and afraid. So, at some point in my career, I decided to completely own being older, and it usually worked quite well.
So, I led with being older, (step 1) then would tell them I’d understand if my age alone would preclude continuing our discussion (step 2.) I’d pause a moment then move to step 3 and say that if they were willing to have a conversation despite my age, and if we both felt it was a match, that my age and experience might well make me the person most likely to succeed in this role.
“Do you think it makes sense to continue our conversation?” (step 4)
Of course, they continued the conversation. When you call it out like this, most employers kind of relax, step back thoughtfully, and say “Yes, we do want to take a look here.” Now, this doesn’t always means they’ll give you a job or buy what you’re selling. And it doesn’t guarantee that they’ll even move forward in any way at all. There were a few times that it became clear in that first interview that my age would be a showstopper. However, finding this out quickly saved us all a bunch of time, even though it wasn’t happy news.
Now, of course, I was older but this strategy will work just as well if you are younger. Or if you’d served time in prison. Or if you were fired. Or had the wrong degree. Whatever is your “elephant in the room.” You simply are calling out the perceived weakness as a possible concern, showing integrity, awareness, opening the possibility that the issue also has some positive points, and allowing you all to discuss it rationally instead of keeping it hidden.
In my next search example, I’d been fired by my previous employer.
“I’m in the job market because my previous employer let me go. I wasn’t able to deliver the results he wanted in the timeframe that he wanted those results. While I think there may be a strong fit with your company, I would understand completely if my being fired is disqualifying.”
Yep, in Step 1, I simply fessed up that my previous employer wanted more from me than I was able to deliver. If you’re in sales or other demanding roles for a long time, this is probably going to happen to you sometime. Everyone who has managed salespeople has let people go for this reason. Sometimes, even great salespeople, like you, find yourselves in this position. Maybe you screwed up. Maybe they doubled your quota and took away a bunch of territory, then let you go for “underperforming.” Perhaps the manager who hired you was fired and his replacement despised you. (All of these situations have happened to me.) Just adjust your Step 1 message accordingly. Just lay it out succinctly, with the quiet confidence that you are still worthwhile, lovable, and valuable to the right employer. No sour grapes. No long explanation. “Just the facts, ma’am.”
But having delivered that, my step 2 sounded something like: “I understand you may not be interviewing people who have been let go sometime in their career. However, if you are willing to do so, there are some thoughts I’d like to share about why I’d be a good fit and quite successful in this role. (step 3)
What do you think?” (step 4)
You’ll probably expect them to be asking a few follow up questions about why you were let go. Be succinct, straightforward and calm. They’ll then move on and you can, too.
“After the company I worked for was sold they laid me off, and I’ve actually not worked for anyone other than my own company in almost 3 years. I’d guess this gap might present an impossible obstacle for some companies. Does it make sense to continue our exploration?”
Here, my Step 1 actually has a hook: “other than my own company.” Because during that time that I was technically unemployed, my wife and I started some businesses and worked to get them off the ground. By laying out my “weakness” up front, I learned, much to my surprise, that many employers like people who take time off to start, explore, or build things. You may have taken time off for your own reasons: care for a sick relative, get a degree, conquer a addiction, raise your children, switch gears in your life, or to see the world. No matter. Look deeply into the things you did during your hiatus and find what is relevant. Look for values you demonstrated, skills that you built during that time — qualities that matter: commitment, discipline, dedication, processes you’ve learned, or perspectives you developed. You’ll deploy these later in the interview, when relevant, to show that your gap was pure gold for you and your new employer. After they give you permission to continue exploring.
Even with a gap, you can go in feeling unstoppable. The key is to discuss what you did with your time and demonstrate what those experiences — and who you became as a result of them — will bring to a potential employer.
The 4 Steps, once more
Your perceived weakness may be different from mine. No matter. Remember the point of using my 4 step process is to
Lay the “elephant in the room” right out there, which takes the energy out of it and lets you all move on.
Give your interviewer tacit permission to walk away if this weakness really is a deal breaker. Hint: emotionally, you may feel that it is a deal breaker but it almost never is a deal breaker to them. Plus, your quiet, understated approach will let them know that it isn’t a deal breaker for you, either.
Set up your intent to demonstrate that despite this perceived weakness — and maybe even because of it, it’s possible you may be their best candidate. (You’re here to see if all that you are is a great fit.)
Wait for them to decide
The Silver Lining: WIIFT (What is in it for them?)
Look at your weakness now. Doesn’t seem quite as scary, does it? In fact, I’d like you to look at your formerly paralyzing weakness and see if you can’t find things it brought or taught you that made you better as a result of it. Things that make you a better candidate and a better person.
In other words - What’s in it for them? What makes you the better person for this job?
Now I’ve just previously hinted at this, but let’s make this plain. That thing that was your perceived weakness has also actually provided you with gifts. Your interview stories, your presence, the questions you ask can all be enriched to reflect and otherwise demonstrate these gifts. And you can even point those gifts out specifically. Those gifts are “whats in it for them” when they hire the unique quantity this is you - with your warts and all. These are the unique things that make you you and make you someone different and memorable as compared to all the other candidates.
Need some examples? Coming back to my three different situations. Remember my perceived weaknesses were: I was old, I was fired, I had a career gap. What could those provide a potential new employer? Let’s pop back to my three examples, once more.
Age
Owning up to being older allowed me to share stories of judgement, seasoning, an ability to negotiate at high levels with senior executives, and, frankly, to be someone the manager isn’t going to have to worry about. Those hiring managers could relax and think “He’ll be my lowest maintenance, lowest risk hire. Oh, and I’m not going to have wipe noses and change diapers with this guy.”
Fired
By quickly and succinctly being frank right upfront about the circumstances of my firing and being fully transparent about why things ended, it took all the pressure out of the conversation. I could then spend the rest of the time demonstrating what I had accomplished at my previous employers that would make me successful here. Plus, by being so upfront, I was telling this person that they could trust me to tell them the truth, even when it wasn’t pretty. And good managers love that.
Career Gap
A gap is all about who you were before and who became as a result of the gap. Your reasons for the gap, (your situation), What you did, (your actions) and you have to show for it (your results.) In my case, the right prospective employers loved that I had initiative, discipline and focus to build a business. I could demonstrate that I developed many relevant skills and knowledge. It’s true that some prospective employers didn’t see value in my gap activities. Well, that’s too bad. But many did, and I ended up with an employer that liked me more because of what I did in that gap.
Now your gap could be for lots of other reasons. Dig in there and be sure to show why this makes you someone special and incredibly valuable to the right employer.
Gifts from dealing with your weakness provide a handle for an employer to hold
You can become known and even loved from what you’ve overcome. When looking for a job your unique situation can also become your “handle,” the unique way that you stand out. The way people understand and grab a hold of who you are. To an employer looking at dozens or hundreds of candidates, a well defined handle makes you pop. In a world where employers are swamped with candidates, being remembered is totally worth this exercise, alone.
“Hey, I think we oughta move forward that person who called himself ‘old’. He brings a lot and will help balance out all our green team members.”
“The person that was fired by XYZ corp has integrity written all over and is a real find. We normally don’t get a shot at people like that.”
“That candidate with the mid-career gap really did some intriguing things - did you hear her? Love that self-start!”
Caveat: An interview isn’t a confessional
While it makes sense to own up to a single major potentially limiting issue right up front, this isn’t a confessional. You’re not going to use the interview to tell the prospective employer every little thing that’s wrong with you.
No, this exercise is to take that single, “elephant in the room” — the thing that they’re going to see eventually anyway — and quickly and memorably address it so we can get on with the business of getting hired. And, when done well, we can make the way we dealt with our elephant stand out in such a way that it becomes a key reason we are hired.
So get in there, and dispatch that elephant promptly in the first couple of minutes. Then spend the rest of the time doing mutual exploration.
I know the reasons you are looking for a job will probably be different from the reasons I shared. Just the same, I advise you to use this process. Embrace who you are, what you are most afraid of, and really show the gifts that that experience has given you — the things that will let you make a difference for your next employer.
So, use Negative Reverse Selling to own the thing you think of as a critical weakness.
Don’t you want and deserve to be somewhere where people value who you are and what you have done?
You’ll be memorable, perceived as honest, and you’ll get better fits for your life and career.
Plus, you’ll enjoy listening to interviewers working to convince you that yes, they really do want to talk with you despite your perceived weakness. (Won’t that be fun?)
And you’ll also come to understand that your experiences and attributes- not just the fun, exciting, and successful ones, but also the difficult and painful ones — all bring gifts that make you unique and valuable.
